Monday, May 28, 2012

The Every-Guy


My phone beeped and by the sound of it, I knew what it was. Another Facebook update. What will it be this time, I wondered? Another friend sharing for the thirty seven thousandth fucking time the latest American Idol video? Jesus.

But it wasn't. I was surprised when I saw it was from my California girl friend Jenny. And then I saw the ominous words: Jenny is engaged to ... Oh my God! I immediately wrote her.

So ... you finally succumbed to the pressure and agreed to marry some American boy???? (My voice rising higher and higher until it reached falsetto at the end.) By the Gods! Will I be the only single girl left in this world, Jenny???? *grins*

So little J, not so little anymore are we? I know you must feel like a thousand feet off the ground. Masaya ako para sa iyo (I am happy for you). I know how much this means for you.


She wrote me back.

"Kahit single girl, basta ikaw ang "It-Girl"! ;-) thanks K! (So what if you're single, as long as you're the "It-Girl")

Oh Jenny. If you only knew. Sigh.

Everyone wants to be an It-Girl.  Or, at least that's what these magazines, films, and TV shows teach us. Beautiful, desirable, and envied by many, these "It-Girls" seem to get all the fun in the world. From dating celebrities to landing on the covers of magazines to being the talk of the town, these girls embody everything we want to be. Popular, well-liked, well-loved.

Vogue U.S. has a regular "It-Girl" column where this month they featured Brazilian model Caroline Trentini and her wedding to photographer Fabio Bartelt.

Websites from Cosmopolitan to the New York Observer have articles on "How to be the Next It-Girl". There's even a Wiki-how on the same subject. Imagine that.

I'm not an "It-Boy". I think I used to be ... but that was then, when I was younger, more eager, more carefree. Nowadays, working ten hours a day saps my energy I can no longer go out and party after. Not like I used to. Slowly by slowly, as the years passed and as my youth faded, my invitations to birthdays, events, shows, orgies (I'm kidding!) dwindled and I find myself relying more and more on my friends to take me out.

"Honey labas naman tayo this weekend," I told Arlan. "It's been ages. I miss you."

"I know! Hay ... I want to but I can't."

"Why not?"

"I ... uhm ... I have a shoot the next day," A replied.

"A shoot? For what?"

"Ahhh ... for a commercial."

"OMG!!! Don't tell meeeeeee .... Are you going to be the new face of Chanel?" I said, teasing him.

"Gago. Hahaha. Wala ... Hahaha. It's for ... uhmmm ... a milk product."

"Milk? Oh. Not exactly what I had in mind but well ... I suppose we all have to start from somewhere," I said. "I'm kidding!!!"

"I wasn't finished.  I also will be in a four-part McDonald's commercial honey!!!" A said.

"Oh my God! You're going to be on TV! And wow, McDonald's? That's frackin' amazing!!" I said.

Later that day, I was telling Gino about A's commercial but I noticed he was only half listening while intently checking out something on the Internet.

"Ano ba. Ano bang tinitingnan mo (What are you looking at)?" I asked.

"I'm checking my stats sa PR," he replied. PR refers to PlanetRomeo, a popular website that caters to gay guys. "Number six na lang ako!!! (I'm now only sixth!)" he lamented.

"Huh? What you mean? Number six saan? (Sixth where?)" I said.

"Sixth most visited profile," Gino explained.

OMG!!! "You mean, you can check that? You mean you're the sixth most popular guy in the whole Manila?" I asked in disbelief.

"No K. In the whole Philippines," he said. "Nakakainis nga eh. Two days ago, I was number one! Hay naku!"

"What the fuck," I said to Carlo. "Akalain mo, our friend is a star and we didn't even know! Hahaha. I love."

"Imagine, one of the most popular guys among hundreds of thousands in the Philippines?" I continued.

"Eh ikaw? Pang-ilan ka? (And you? What's your rank?)" Carlo replied, teasing me

"Ay naku, huwag mo ng itanong. Baka mga below 50,000 ako!! (Let's not even ask. I probably rank something like below 50,000!)!," I replied laughing.

"Eh kasi naman, hot talaga si Gino with his abs and all," Carlo said.

"I know. Sigh. Sometimes, I wish I'm as hot as he is."

That night, as lay in bed, I got to thinking about my friends and their soaring popularity. I must admit I miss being the "It-Boy" ... sometimes. As they say, things come and then they go. But that's okay. As I grew older, I realized I'd really rather be more of the "Every-Guy". Instead of being beautiful, gorgeous and unobtainable, I'd rather be the guy everyone can relate to.

So here I am. The Every-Guy. I'm the guy without abs and so I must always remember to refrain from taking my shirt off in public, no matter how drunk I get lest I embarrass myself. I don't have arms as huge as trees, no matter how hard I try to lift those weights. I'm the guy without a modeling contract. I don't have tens of thousands of men wanting to fuck with me. I'm not dating celebrities. Heck, I'm not even dating anyone.

What I have instead, are simply my stories. And perhaps, they will be enough.


eon said...

Nakakarelate ako. Although I've never been popular to start with, so I never knew the feeling.

rudeboy said...

Sic transit gloria mundi, Kane.

Although I once said that the passage of time is more cruel to the beautiful, still, better to have been the "It-Boy" once, than never having been "It-Boy" at all.

Anonymous said...

I remember a similar post, sir Kane. He was the one you experimented with in Grndr, ryt? :)


Mugen said...

They may be aesthetically pleasing, but you have the intelligence, Kane. And looks fade with time. As for Gino, there will come a time when his looks doesn't appeal anymore. Remember how I used to call him the God of O-Bar Malate? Hehe. Believe me, sometimes, the brains can bag you the best men in town. Haha.

Yas Jayson said...


I agree with Mugen, it's the brains that bag the best men in town.

You are the most glowing Every-Guy I will ever have. K, didn't I tell you that you are the most beautiful storyteller I have ever met? You are. And you always bring me to anyplace your story is set.

Cheer up, sunshine.

Mac Callister said...

andrama naman hehehe. at sana makita ko yang pagtataas mo ng shirt para makita ko yang abs mo!

Aris said...

oh kane. relate na relate. haha!

joelmcvie said...

The transition between It-Boy and After It-Boy is as tricky as transitioning from child star to having a post-teen career.

You're evolving wonderfully. Give Madge a run for her money.

LJ said...

i never been an it boy, never have dreams of being one. Well, I was never the popular type, never have plans of being one. haha!

being the every guy is okay. I think when you are the every guy, people will be more real to you. They will accept you for who you are and what you have to offer - in spite of not having abs or good lucks.

We like you the way you are, K.

JJ Roa Rodriguez said...

Super relate ako dito... Im not goodlooking, dont have the good abs and arms too, hehehe... But maybe because of my personality and family that I became one of the guys that is always invited in parties and occasions until the time na padalang na an invitation. It's not because that they now like me less but ako na mismo ang nagbaback out. It came to a point na natututo ka nang magprioritize kung ano ba ang mga okasyon na gusto mong puntahan because there are more important things to do na for the future... That's one reason why I left Philippines... Anyway, i know parties and occassions are still there. Di yan nauubos, kung babalikan ko pa, hindi na seguro. Yong mga importante na lang... Ang importante, i can see my good party future pag di ko na kailangan magwork.. Hehehe...

Nice post!..


C said...

Beautiful post K.

Don't worry next time we raise our glasses, we'll raise our shirts with it!Until then we'll use plastic cups. haha =D

john stan said...

I won't say that I can relate because, in fact, I can't. But knowing you, Kane, I have the utmost belief that, looks aside, and I am not saying you don't have it, you can still give the hottest It-Boy in town a run for his money.

Anonymous said...

Are A and Gino really stupid in person? awww

bien said...

"Instead of being beautiful, gorgeous and unobtainable, I'd rather be the guy everyone can relate to."

Thank you Ms Philippines!

Cue music....Send in the clowns hahahahas

Mr. Chan said...

there are so many times na naramdaman ko din na it sucks to be just a regular guy.

It's the big "A" :) and it's the key.