Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Fuck Me I'm Famous

"Find Me, Kiss Me, Use Me, Abuse Me, Fuck Me I'm Famous!".

Hey Upper Eastsiders! The year has scarcely turned and already we're seeing the onset of a new social dynasty. The big question is: with K single and on top of the world, will Manila ever be the same again?

It was another one of those weekend nights of partying, dancing and drinking. That night, I met six guys including Jayvee.

Jayvee was tall, built, semi-kalbo, and the minute he saw me, he approached me and said you're the most goodlooking guy here tonight.

I was taken aback and gave him my most charming "I-don't-believe-you-but-I-want-to" smile. We danced, and touched, and then before I knew it, I met King J.

My friend started teasing us, egging us to kiss. So I kissed him.

King J: Grabe ka. You're such a tease.
K: Ha? Why?
King J: When you kiss me, you would bite my lower lip. But when I try to kiss you back, you would push me away.

E: OMG. You're such a tease.
K: But I don't even remember it. I was so drunk.

On my way home, E texted me.
E: K, this night is yours. I'm so happy for you and so proud of you. Be uber happy. I want you to experience the best this fucking life has to offer. I'll be here, your most avid fan, cheering you up as we both take it to the next level. Go K!
K: Grabe E, I was so good at being in a relationship, nakalimutan ko na ang galing galing ko palang manlalaki. Parang teka lang, before I turned housewife, I forgot I was everyone's favorite it girl.

In the past two months, I have met dozens of men including a sommelier, a graphic artist student, a nursing student, a nursing teacher, a photographer, a chef, and an event organizer.

I enjoyed meeting them and liked hearing their stories. Ed, the wine sommelier, works at a luxury cruise liner and was in town for vacation. When he started talking about Cabernet Sauvigon, Pinot Noir, and Merlot, I said "Stop. You had me at Merlot."

How could these men resist? Week after week, I met more and more of them and slept with some of them. Most of them were harmless fun, your usual weekend encounter. And then one night, I found myself sucking a guy inside a restroom in a club.

He closed the door behind us, looked at me and smiled teasingly, all the time giving me that knowing look. Before I knew it, he had unzipped his zipper and had taken out his hard cock.

We didn't speak a word to each other, not even a hi. I don't know his name. And because I'm so vulnerable right now, wala na akong nagawa.

V: So K, it's official. Welcome back to Hollywood.
K: Hahahaha. You know what, it feels like I never left.

There are days when I do miss the consistency of being in a happy relationship.

K: Oo nga, ang saya kagabi. Pero the next day, it's all the same. Lalabas ka naman. Anong gagawin mo? Manlalalaki?
V and I answered simultaneously, "Oo!"

But lest we forget, there is also a danger in meeting men. And when four of them told me they have fallen for me, I realized I should control myself.

MA: You know what K? Minsan lang ako mag ka crush sa isang guy. Kahit madaming guys doon, I don't care kasi may crush nako. But don't worry K, ngayon wala na. Nag fade na kagabi. Kasi ano gagawin ko? Wait for nothing?
K: Ayan na, guilt trip. I can feel it coming. :(
MA: Guilt trip? Why should I? Don't worry, it's not your fault. Kasalanan ko. Maybe being in love creates a state of temporary insanity especially if you're in love with the wrong person.
K: Wha wha what? Meron ng in love? Whew, you barely know me, relax.
MA: Love keeps me going and inspired, yet I'm unappreciated.
K: You know, just because love is not returned in the same exact way you want it to, doesn't mean the person doesn't care for you or appreciate you.
MA: Wheee? Di nga? :)
K: At least, that's what I've learned :)

This led to a debate between me and some of my friends.

E: Ikaw kasi, may talk pa kayo. Alam mo naman you don't want a relationship.
K: But I enjoy kasi getting to know them. And because we talk, it is possible for us to be friends, not just some guy you had a thing with before.
E: Yeah, but the thing is, once these people really get to know you, they'll fall.
K: Sigh. So what do I do? Alangan naman puro sex na lang?

Being single can be tricky. There's always the thrill of the hunt, whether you are the hunter or the prey. Sometimes the chase can take you to places you've never gone before. But going too far and crossing lines we've drawn may mean you never find your way back.

And when that happens, you know who will be watching.

"What we do is innocent, just for fun and nothin' meant."


anteros' dominion said...

at least you are doing good..

take care

Galen said...

There's a season for turning around. For now, enjoy the moment. The closer you get to the end, the nearer the chances of you settling down. :)

thecuriouscat said...

tempting ang lifestyle mo :D

jericho said...

you came, they saw, you conquered :D

Anonymous said...

you should bring me to these places. hahaha. one of these days, K. one of these days.

Marx said...

Pa check ka na! Chos...

I love it Karl, you have na the 'Fuck Me' Attitude.

joelmcvie said...

You have no control if they fall for you; that's THEIR choice to make. So do not feel responsible for something they chose.

However, do play fair. Tell them clearly that you're not seeking a romantic relationship. It may hurt them, and you may feel their hurt too. Collateral damage, comes with the territory.

You're a blazing star, and if they make a mistake of getting too close, they will get burned. But so what? Go ahead, shine away!

Edward Kenneth said...

Ikaw na nga talaga.. nakakaloka ang Club thing mo.. well like V said WELCOME..... mine, WELOCOME TO WONDERLAND... at dahil dyan K, Congratulations. Hugggs panalo.. ikaw na nga ang Tunay na TALA!

All the best dear

daydreamer said...

It's good that you're having a blast Kane. Just enjoy life, take things easy, and do things that will make you and will keep you genuinely happy for a long time. it's that time when all that matters is yourself and nobody else. make the most out of it my friend. keep me posted. :)

engel said...

the perks of being single.


Jethro Cuenca said...

...and with each face of a fuck, sometimes, you recognize yourself... and though it's lonely, you never fall for it, so you run again and again catching every bit of wonder... and somehow somewhere you outrun yourself and find control... but it's not time yet... your road spells a whole lot... enjoy it darling, it's special...

citybuoy said...

ahhh.. the single life.

i can suddenly hear kristin chenoweth belting glee's last name. haha

it's good to play. just always be careful. :D

♥nova-san said...

It's always the thrill of meeting someone that brings you back out there, time and again. There's an indescribable high in firsts: first kiss, first conversation, first touch, first sexual encounter, that fades after the firsts are over. But after some time, the firsts don't feel so good anymore, and it's the long-term love and relationships that really complete us.

But while the long-term relationship is not there, it's never bad to enjoy all the firsts. Just be careful. :-)

kiel estrella said...

you're such a delightful irony of i'm-all-that cockiness and i-can't-believe-he'll-fall-for-me bashfullness. if i didn't know you, i would think it's an act.

since everybody is saying 'yey! go go go kane', which is partly what i want to say. i'll just go to the other part of my comment and ask, you are having fun but are you happy?

the thing is kane, this 'fun' is 'fun' until it's not anymore (like when you hurt someone who falls for you against his better judgement), di ba? so go sow your wild oats, but (as your kuya-kuyahan)discern when it is fun or just acting out. gets?

Anonymous said...

There are days when I do miss the consistency of being in a happy relationship.

consistency. constancy.

(yan na muna. i need to catch up. i will read everything. :p)